Monday, April 4, 2016

The Silence Was Deafening

The congregation started singing an Easter Sunday favorite and my heart was ready, open and expectant. The first verse finished and the refrain began, "Up from the grave he arose,..." I leaned over to my mother with a little smile and whispered, (he arose). She returned my smile with a knowing look.

The song continued through the rest of the refrain and into the next verse.  As the refrain started for the second time, "Up from the grave he arose" the tears burned in my eyes as the deafening silence boomed in my ears, my head and my heart.

My tears spilled over onto my cheeks. I tried to inconspicuously swipe them away but with each verse the silence boomed louder and louder screaming a reminder that my father's strong, deep voice would never again sing the echoing (he arose) in this joyful Easter song.

I tried to maintain a normal expression on my face as my heart screamed and protested at the silent reminder. I missed my dad so badly my whole body hurt.

As I contemplated why I put myself through this pain and considered the possibility of staying home next time, it hit me.  He arose!  These words should bring joy, not pain.  Jesus rose from the dead giving us the promise of life ever after.  A life where I will see my dad again. For me, this promise eases the pain and fills the silence with joy.

Hallelujah, he arose!      

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